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Stoker Mates, I've a tale for you, It happened to me, And it could happen to you. It happened to me
just this way, On Submarine open day.
I was out in the Donk Shop for a while, Answering questions with a smile, I looked through 77 and there
she stood, With one leg normal, And one of wood.
She stepped through the door with a 'clunk' I'm telling you now, it was all to much. With long blonde hair,
and such rare beauty, I overlooked her disability.
She asked 'are you a Stoker sport?' I bet you can rev, and I bet you can snort, I thought old mate, you're
quids in here, I'll show her the works of the turning gear.
I took her 'round the side of port, And she slipped in oil, just like I thought. Without hesitation, nor
any guilt, Down with the pants, and right up to the hilt.
Wood chips flew, and hair did fly, She gave out a moan, and gave out a sigh, And then she screamed-'you
Stoker fiend' You've snapped my leg off nice 'n clean.
I went down to the Engineers Store, found some glue, and sent out for some more. I glued it up so precisely,
and smoothed it off With some fine emery.
I calmed her down, with a white 'n two, And that's not all, I'm telling you. When she went to leave, I
had to laugh. One shoe pointed For'ard, and the other one Aft.
Now this girl, is the wife of mine, With her Starboard leg of the finest pine. I found the wood on a packing
crate, And it was carved by my 'Chippy' mate.
There is a moral to this ditty, When you're on a 'jolly' in a foreign city Go ashore and spend your pay,
And hope you don't score an open day
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Comments
Comment by: Rubberlegs on March 17th, 2019
very very funny .....love chicken on a raft by Cyril Tawney by the way.
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